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Cancer: Staging

We got a crash course in cancer staging our first few days after Anna’s tumor was discovered. We were told that an MRI and CT Scan were needed to determine staging so we scheduled her appointments. Here’s a pic that gives an overview of the Stages:

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Stage 1 is the hyperplasia; Stage 2 dyplasia; Stage 3 in situ cancer; Stage 4 Invasive cancer

We were hopeful for Stage 1 or 2, as surgery only is standard protocol. We were disappointed to learn from the doctor that Anna has Stage 3 colon cancer. The recommended protocol is 5 weeks of chemo and radiation to shrink the tumor, followed by surgery. As you might imagine, this was hard news for Anna and me both.

The morning after staging was complete and we talked to the doctor, Anna and I did our Pray As You Go together and found these words of Jesus appropriate and comforting:

“I leave behind with you—peace; I give you my own peace and my gift is nothing like the peace of this world. You must not be distressed and you must not be daunted. You have heard me say, ‘I am going away and I am coming back to you.’ If you really loved me, you would be glad because I am going to my Father, for my Father is greater than I. And I have told you of it now, before it happens, so that when it does happen, your faith in me will not be shaken. I shall not be able to talk much longer to you for the spirit that rules this world is coming very close. He has no hold over me, but I go on my way to show the world that I love the Father and do what he sent me to do.” (John 14:27-31 JBP)

“You must not be distressed and you must not be daunted.” Those words hung in the air as we listened to the reader say that statement of Jesus. As this reality of staging sets in we are doing our best not to be distressed and not to be daunted. Please continue to join us as we lean on the peace that is nothing like the peace this world offers.

 

 

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An Ongoing Relationship

In my last post I pointed out that the Cross was the pinnacle battle between God and Satan. God won the battle, once for all, and the Cross is the reminder that He is the victor. So if the battle is won then what is going on in our world today!? It sure seems like a battle is still going on.

Peter, one of Jesus’ closest companions, says makes this statement years after the Cross and Resurrection of Jesus. “Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.” (1 Peter 5:8) Wait, this statement came after the defeat of Satan? Why is Peter telling his audience (and us) to stay alert and watch out after Satan was defeated?

While the defeat of Satan happened through the Cross of Christ, there is, in fact, still a battle going on. In light of the great battle and God’s ultimate rescue mission to save man, the battle is now against an ongoing relationship between individual man and God. Satan’s primary desire is no longer to be God, he lost that battle. His mission now is to keep men and women from being in a growing relationship with God as Father, Son, Spirit.

Preventing this growing relationship was what Satan was interested in from the beginning. He saw the harmonious intimate relationship between God and man in the garden and he despised it. It makes sense then that Satan would attempt to prevent man from growing in this relationship with God. And, Satan will stand for almost anything else, before he will lie down and let man sit with the one and only true God. He will tolerate good works, giving, worship, church attendance, education, reading, etc, but the main thing he battles against today is each of us growing in relationship with our Creator God.

So on this Good Friday as we reflect on the Cross of Jesus, the best thing we can do to battle Satan is to commit to growing on our relationship with God. Every relationship that is important to me gets time and space. It is a priority to me and the other person and we create space for one another. You and I  get to join God in the ongoing defeat of Satan by creating space to be with God and God alone.

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From Situation Help to Constant Care

There is something about being human that causes us to reach out to God when we need help. We get into a situation at home, at work, in a relationship or crisis, and we call out to God asking him to help us. While there are plenty of instances of situational help from God throughout the Bible, the promise is that we are living in the constant care of God.

“For consider what he (God) has done—before the foundation of the world he chose us to become, in Christ, his holy and blameless children living within his constant care. He planned, in his purpose of love, that we should be adopted as his own children through Jesus Christ.” (Eph 1:4)

This teaching of Paul is a reminder of the reality that you and I living in the constant care of God. We have been adopted as his children. Think about this from the perspective of a parent. Does a parent offer situation help to a child or constant care? My friend Kent Hotaling writes this about care, “ The experience of God caring for us – even when He is not “curing” us as quickly as we choose, is necessary for us to be able to pass along this kind of care for others.”

Maybe this constant care of God is more kind and gracious than the situational help we so often think we desire. Allowing ourselves to be cared for by God is learned at a much slower pace that we would prefer. We are not accustomed to be cared for. We are taught to do life on our own and cry out for help only when we are desperate. Living today believing the truth that we are care for by the God of all things can have a dramatic impact on how we view life. The truth is that you and I are cared for.

Do we dare believe this reality?

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What is Mercy…Really?

“Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy.” (Matt 5:7)

What is mercy? There is often talk of the grace of God, but what is the mercy of God?

Mercy in Greek language is eleēmōn – showing kindness or goodwill toward one afflicted, joined with a desire to relieve them of pain. As I looked at this verse and the Greek understanding of the word mercy, I realized something about pain. Pain is often a result of loneliness. It’s far more frequent to feel the pain of being alone than it is to feel the pain of a certain situation. In fact, having someone with us in our pain can drastically curb the pain that comes from circumstance. More often than not, the underlying desire is to be relived of loneliness.

God made himself so vulnerable, so little, so lonely in Jesus that he might identify with our loneliness and meet us in our pain. God becoming human was the ultimate act of mercy. You and I get to join God in his act of mercy through getting close enough to other human’s to feel their pain. We can only help do that for someone else when we realize that we have been relieved of our own loneliness. We must allow ourselves to get close enough to our own pain and let Jesus meet us in our time of need.

Verse 7 says we are blessed when we are merciful. What is the action in this statement of Jesus? Merciful is not the action, it is not the verb! “Blessed ARE the merciful…” The action is ARE, the action is TO BE. The emphasis of this “Your blessed” statement of Jesus is receptivity and not activity. Jesus is revealing to the crowd (and to us) that we will naturally respond with mercy the more open and vulnerable we are to receive God’s mercy.

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Are You Content?

We are suffering from an epidemic of discontent. What we don’t have, aren’t experiencing, can’t achieve often dominates our thought life. “If only…” or “When _______ happens then…” For some reason it seems easier to focus on what isn’t happening, instead of all of the remarkable things that happen every day.

The third “blessed” of Jesus in Matthew 5, Message translation is,

“You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are—no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.” (Matt 5:5)

Being content with just who we are-no more, no less. That sounds amazing and is a challenge. Being content with who we are involves believing the truth of what God says about us. The truth that we are loved, known, cared for, that we are his sons and daughters. Being content also involves being honest about how we feel today, right now, in the midst of joy or sadness, trusting that God is with us.

It’s pretty great being around a person who is content with who they are. We can sense it. We may not even know what it is, but we are drawn to the person. He or she puts us at ease when we are with them. The most content person to ever walk this earth was Jesus. A few days before his death Jesus washed his closest friends feet, “Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into His hands, and that He had come forth from God and was going back to God, 4 got up from supper, and laid aside His garments; and taking a towel, He girded Himself.” (John 13:3-4) Jesus did this act of a servant knowing who he was, where he had come from and where he was going.

The more time we spend with Jesus the more content we become with who we are. A content person is comfortable in his or her own skin and it shows. We can’t will ourselves to contentment. It is a bi-product of being with Jesus, allowing his opinion of us to remind us of who we are.

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Have You Lost What is Most Dear?

In continuing the look at Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 5, the second “blessed” in the Message translation is,

“You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.” (Matthew 5:4)

What is most dear to you? I thought I lost what was most dear to me many years ago. As we know, love is a basic human need. I believe there is validity to the 5 Love Languages book that came out years ago. I took the test back then and realized that my primary love language is physical touch. I took me years after reading that book to realize that I did not receive physical touch on a daily and sometime even weekly basis. My mom left town when I was 7 and my dad remarried quickly to a lady who had a son my age. Any affection she had to give was toward her birth son, not my siblings or me. My dad had four young kids and a high-pressure job, so physical touch wasn’t on his radar.

As a young man I began to crave physical touch. I entered into a number of short-term relationships with girls trying to get my need met. Each relationship would last about three months, then I would break it off because emotional closeness was being offered along with the physical touch. That was too much for me.

When Anna and I married I thought physical touch was most dear to me. After all that was my love language. It turns out that seeking physical touch without relational vulnerability, intimacy and connection doesn’t work. Confused and hurt on why I wasn’t getting my love “need” met, I turned to God to meet the void I was feeling.

“You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.”

Did you see it. “Only then” Ofte we have to loose something in order to gain something. In my case I lost the counterfeit promise that physical touch alone could meet my longing. This allowed me to be “embraced by the One most dear.” The embrace of the One has become the primary embrace in my life. Practically, spending time each day sitting in silence with God as Father, Son and Spirit provides a mysterious embrace and meets a deeper longing than I knew I had.

What is most dear to you and have you lost it?

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From Control to Kingdom

We are a few weeks into Lent, almost. Have you been able to put your finger on what you would like to move away from and what you would like to move toward? Lately I have been reading the teaching of Jesus in Matthew 5 over and over. I like reading Matthew 5:1-12 in the Message translation. I’ve found that these teaching of Jesus can help us identify what we want to move away from and what we want to move toward.

“You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule. (Matt 5:3)

Really? Jesus begins there. Who wants to be at the end of their rope? I know I don’t. I like having things figured out. I like knowing what is going to happen and when. The end of the rope does not feel good. So why does Jesus say we are blessed when we are at the end of our rope?

My friend Doug Barrem is 79 years old going on 59. He has a sharp mind and has taken good care of his body over the years. He is wise beyond his years, and that is saying something.  Recently he was reading Matthew 5 and saw something new in Jesus’ teaching. He showed me that each one of the “Your blessed…” is an invitation to lose something or order to gain something. Matthew 5:3, according to Doug, is an invitation to loose power in order to gain the Kingdom.

I think I hear what Jesus was saying, along with my friend Doug. The more we release control and power, there more room there is for God to be who he is in our lives. Maybe that is something to move away from, control and power. Jesus teaches as we move away from control and power we naturally moved toward the Kingdom.

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Finding the Father

Our 5 year-old daughter Hadassah, our youngest, finds me in the morning. Most mornings of the week I leave the house early before our kids awake, but on the weekend Hadassah wakes up first and she finds me. I have a few places I like to sit in the house. She looks for me, finds me, crawls into my lap and sits there in my arms. (I know, she’s 5 it surprises me too that she just sits there for a while)

Each morning Hadassah finds me she enters into my morning ritual of sitting with the Father. It has become my favorite thing to do. To sit, to listen, to be still. So I sit there with the Father and in comes my daughter to sit with her father. I promise I am not making this up to make a point or be poetic, or give a visual of what is offered to us each morning through a growing intimate relationship with God the Father. I am just letting you in on what is happening, real time, in my own life and in the life of our youngest daughter.

If you have young kids chances are you are experiencing or have experienced the joy and exhaustion of young kids wanting as much face time with you as possible. They will take as much as they can get. Especially that one-on-one, on the floor down on their level, playing the games they choose. Or the time right before bed when they ask for one more story, one more song, one more kiss.

It’s hard to imagine sometimes but it is true, in fact the truest reality there is, that you and I have a Father who can’t get enough of us. He is with us, giving us as much time and attention as we want. And his favorite time is that one-on-one, on the floor down on our level, playing the games we choose. And somehow, in a mysterious way you are his favorite one.

 

 

 

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From a Good Idea Toward Action

In my last post I pointed out that I noticed something new in the story of the father and two son’s in the Gospel of Luke. The statement, “He got the the point,” stood out. It happened to me again this morning as I kept reading that same story.

“Then he came to his senses and cried aloud, ‘Why, dozens of my father’s hired men have got more food than they can eat and here I am dying of hunger! I will get up and go back to my father, and I will say to him, “Father, I have done wrong in the sight of Heaven and in your eyes. I don’t deserve to be called your son any more. Please take me on as one of your hired men.”’ (Luke 15:18)

The son had an idea, an ah ha of sorts. As I imagine the posture of this young man, desperate and out of options, feeling at the end of himself I wonder if he ran scenarios through his head the way I do. I often think, ok this isn’t working, I wonder if this would. Surely if I do this it will help the situation. Rarely does it help. Returning to this story with this son it seems like of the the things he came up with was, “Oh I’ve got it! I will get up and go back to my father… that’s what I’ll do. I’ll prepare a speech and go, that’s a great idea!”

Here is the new learning for me this morning, it’s in the following verse. Jesus, as the narrator of the story says this about the son, “So he got up and went to his father.” There it is, action. True repentence: re-evaluation that leads to action. The son didn’t just come up with the idea to go to the father, or consider it enough that he knew what would be best for him at the moment, to go to the father. No, this son actually got up and went to the father.

Chances are if you are reading this blog you know how the story ends, you know the fathers reaction. It’s remarkable to say the least. You and I have access to that same reaction, that same love as we move from time with the Father being a good idea toward physically, actually getting up and going to the Father. We are his sons and daughters after all.

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Have You Gotten To The Point?

Jesus tells a story in Luke 15 about two sons. It might be familiar to you. One of the sons decides to move away from one thing in his life and move toward another. This one decision changes the course of this son’s life.

After demanding his inheritance from his Father, something that would have been implausible in the Jewish culture, the son leaves home and spends all of his money on wild living. After his money runs out, the son eventually gets hired on with a pig farmer, possibly the most humiliating job for a Jewish son. Check out Jesus’ words as he tells the next part of the story, “He got to the point of longing to stuff himself with the food the pigs were eating and not a soul gave him anything.” (v16)

From privilege and wealth to poverty and pig slop. Young Literal Translation translates Jesus’ words this way, “And having come to himself…” I like to think that this young man comes to the end of himself and realizes something has to change. He gets to the point where life is not working the way he planned, so he decides to return to his father. He moves away from doing life on his own, and moves toward home, not knowing what is waiting for him there.

Have you gotten to the point? Is what you are doing in your life working? Are you trying to do life on your own? The son in this story  longs to stuff himself with pig slop, but he knows that, even in his deep hunger, the food will not satisfy. Only one thing curbs our longing, and it’s actually not a thing at all; it’s a return to the Father.