A Slow Process

I would like to say that things changed overnight when I made a commitment to get with Jesus every day.  The truth is that when I began this practice ten years ago I was in a bad state.  I didn’t know who I was, believed all kinds of lies about myself, and was pretty convinced that life was primarily about survival.  I had been married for just over a year and things were not going well in our marriage.  My stomach was in knots most of the day, and I soon found myself in the doctor’s office for pain in my gut.  After completing my first 30 days in a row with Jesus everything in me wanted to quit.  My life was not going well and getting time with Jesus wasn’t helping.  Something in me, which I now know was the Spirit of God, kept me coming back to the well.  Paul tells us, “the same spirit that raised Jesus from the dead lives in you.” (Rms 8:11) That is a powerful spirit!

Gradually over the years, things began to shift.  Through Scripture, listening, friendship and teaching, I started to believe what God says about me.  I began to believe that Jesus’ promise of “life to the fullest” (John 10:10) was for me.  I started memorizing scriptures like: I will give you a new heart, and put a new spirit within you… (Ez 36:26) The Lord your God is in your midst, A victorious warrior, He will exult over you with joy, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy. (Zeph 3:17)  Be determined and confident. Do not be afraid of them. Your God, the Lord himself, will be with you. He will not fail you or abandon you.” (Deut 31:6)

I continue to learn new things about myself and the Lord each day.  This is truly a journey in the process, and it keeps getting better as I live more into this life that Jesus designed for me.


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